Got Sensitivity?

   

      Do you consider yourself a sensitive person?  Or has anyone ever told you that you are "too sensitive?"  If not, I am sure that someone in your sphere of existence is.  Sensitivity can be far more than just an increased emotional experience of life, but rather a physiological predisposition in which one's nervous system is actually quite acute and processes the information or stimulation of life at a more rapid rate than some other people.  Perhaps loud noises create extreme discomfort or bright flashing lights and large crowds of people.  Individuals that are highly sensitive may also be empathic, that is, they tend to "feel" others deeply and are very responsive to others' emotions whether exposed or hidden.  Througout history, people in all walks of life, but especially poets and artists have often been sensitive in some of these ways which has fostered thier creativity, but they are also subject to the shadow side of sensitivity which can easily lead to depression, addiction and isolation.

     In addition to heightened sensory experience, creativity and empathy I have recognized deep sensitivity among both depressed and anxious people, those suffering food allergies and environmental disorders, "mystery" diseases such as chronic fatigue syndrome, and fibromyalgia, and addicts that are naturally very empathic.  When not managed properly, our sensitivity can push us toward isolation, a constant state of feeling overwhelmed, fearful and sad without being able to identify why, constant issues of unworthiness, stuck or blocked creativity, and inhabiting the body only partially.  Like all challenges, being highly sensitive has both its dark and light sides.  Many are drawn to spirituality and mysticism, the healing professions or teaching in some capacity and tend to be very intuitive.  Highly sensitive people have much to offer their families or communities and world at large but prefer finding their own way of expressing themselves.  Most, but not all, sensitives are introverts and prefer a more quiet approach to life and work.  Unfortunately our culture places a significant value on the personality that is "out there" and often like the loudest child in the family, gets the most attention.  This sends a message to those who operate under different conditions that they we are not good enough and should be more like them in order to be successful. 

     It comes as no surprise that much of my own depression came from great sensitivity.  I believe that as I have learned to hold both the gifts and limitations of sensitivity with equality and become involved in work that allows me to use my intuition and knowledge together, I have been able to heal.  Now as a parent, I recognize a similar sensitivity in one of my children and am learning how to parent in a way that will hopefully encourage the gift as well as support the passage through the difficulties.  As valuable and empowering as it can be to recognize yourself as highly sensitive and understand that there really is nothing inherently "wrong" with you, it can also become an identity trap that will only limit your full range of being.  So use it wisely to help you learn about yourself but be careful not to attach too concretely to any "type." 

     I hope to work with HSP's* more in the future but for now here are the five main keys I would offer to anyone who is highly sensitive and looking for help:

• Support--know that you are not alone and that it is important to find someone or a group of people that sees, hears and understands you.
• Accept--use your sensitivity to recognize that you have a gift rather than hide behind it (which is what most sensitives would rather do)!
• Empower/Embody--get into your body--commit to a physical practice like yoga that will help you ground and open safely.
• Align with the Highest--nurture your spirituality by connecting deeply with your heart and studying a sacred tradition that resonates with you.  Focus on developing the qualities of the heart: forgiveness, love, compassion, gratitude, etc.
• Give--share your gifts with someone in need.  Perhaps a healing touch or simple smile or any way that feels most natural for you to offer your sensitivity to another.

     Sensitivity is synonymous with being concious, keen, knowing, perceptive and responsive when expressed positively.  These qualities are imperative for us to live whole and sustainable lives.

     Below are a couple of resources that I have found helpful in understanding sensitivity:

*"Highly Sensitive Person" from the work of Elaine Aron on the subject.  She wrote both The Highly Sensitive Person and The Highly Sensitive Child ( http://www.hsperson.com/)

Susan Cain wrote a wonderful book on introverts--check it out here: http://www.thepowerofintroverts.com/